It has officially been 26 hours since I last ate. W00T!

Blah! I hate this knotted stomach feeling. In time it shall pass, but until then I'll be not eating or sleeping. Fuck I hate change.

I see her point though. I honestly do. I had my son at 19. When I finally moved into my moms it was right before my 21st birthday. I fucking ran wild! I'd put him to sleep, and run out the door. Of course it only lasted about 2 months for me. But that was 2 months of being irresponsible. Not being a mom full time, and having fun.

Can't fault someone for wanting that now can you? Tiz the age of discovery. Let's just hope that she doesn't discover that I am total shit, and that she never wants me back. pffft! blah!

It would be so much easier if she was committed to me and running wild. lol

Sound dumb? Probably. But, that's my head for you. Fuck this weekend is gonna suck. I already feel the walls closing in. I think I might have to cut again tonight so I can sleep. The shock knocks me out for a few hours. Numbs the internal pain alot. I just have to pick a diff spot. The spot I've been doing has taken alot in the last 2 shots. Twice in 3 days. I don't think it can handle a 3rd. lol

But, that is why being fat is a good thing. Lots to cut, and lots to tattoo. I shall sacrifice some bills this month I think. It's time to mark this ending with some ink. Same shit, diff year.

I just wish she would have made it to a year with me first. My ex broke it off 15 days before 5 years, and she broke this 15 days before 1 year. Talk about a punch in the gut! What is with women and 15 days? I just wish I was good enough. Or who I was 10 years ago. I miss the partying, and dancing.

I'm older than my years, and boring now. *sigh*

I am trying my hardest not to get laid tonight. or this weekend for that matter. I always move on by grabbing the first clean cunt offered to me. I don't think I want to do that this time though. I think she deserves more respect than that. I don't want to rush into "getting over" her. I think I want to wait a bit first, to see what happens. When it looks to be over for good, I'll take the offers. I think it's all sympathy fucks anyway. lol

But I gotta say. Getting lost in a pussy sounds good right about now. That's always been my best escape.

Good then. I'm fucking stoned! Yehaw!

Now, to get some bud here. he he

Blah!

Okay, so I have a very pissed off rabbit. Get this...

I get a buzz at the door when I'm clearing shit off, and 3 men come into my place right. The rabbit is under the table, when it gets moved, and I grab him and lock him in his cage. In 15 minutes my kitchen table and chairs, couch, blue chair, and computer desk get removed.

I sweep the kitchen floor, then plop down to suck on a cancer stick. I look back at him, and open his cage, he flies out like a shot, and starts freaking out. The little fucker was doing fucking donuts! Everything is gone, and he's all lost and shit. It was funny as fuck, then I kinda started to feel sorry for his fuzzy ass. Until he found a couple of M&M's that were on the floor. He spazzed for about 45 min though.

Then he got fed up and went into his cage. He's pissed.

My mom and Satan came over after she grabbed him from school. They were all shocked by how the place echos now. I just told them that the place is as destroyed and empty as I feel. I don't want to go down there right now. I'll do the big clean tomorrow. Maybe I'll take that chick up on her offer. Get some help cleaning this rat hole.

What a predicament I am in. She said that if I was with someone else she didn't care, that it had nothing to do with her. Does that mean go for it? Would going for it end any future chance of anything? Or.... do I just do it and say nothing. But give up and move on myself. Damn brain. Once a whore, always a whore. I just wanted to be told don't do it today. Instead I got a "whatever". Temptation is a biznatchio.

Well, there you have it. Temptation is calling me. Looks like I'll be stepping out in a bit here, then company will be coming back with me. lol

No you dirty fuck, I ain't gonna be fucking anyone..I don't think. But..I know they smoke pot.

And then the call comes in that says "NO! I don't want you fucking anyone! This is just a break!"

Thank fuck! The words I needed to hear just came out. It's sad that she knows me that well that she asks me who I am going to fuck. lol

I know you are going to read this Kris.....

I'm going to hang outside with the yokels, then Daph is coming up to hang out. And yes, I will be good. I promise. lol

There! You have it in writing now! Bwuahahahaha!

But, I should go wandering off, as peeps are waiting, and gotta meet the daisey chain out there. lol

*toddles off to be dumb*

IVY

Quiet-Bitch!

~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017
~Relaxation~ - Tuesday, Sept. 01, 2015
~The hunt is on.~ - Tuesday, Aug. 04, 2015
~Sometimes~ - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014
~Fawk~ - Tuesday, Jan. 07, 2014