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~Valentines????~ Monday, Feb. 14, 2005 - 12:03 PM You know..... You would think that circumstances being what they are, I should be depressed today. But I'm not.
No, I am calm, relaxed, happy, and almost content. She keeps telling me that the past doesn't matter, and she will never judge me for it. She says that history may have repeated itself before, but things are always changing, and maybe everything will change because I met her. She speaks with such sincerity. I can't help but listen, and believe her. I dunno? Maybe this is a turning point in my life? Maybe things start to begin now? Maybe I needed to wade through the sewage to fint the diamond? I'm not sure. All I know is she got into my head, and is working at going further. Her innocence still amazes me to no end. It frightens me how much of a connection we have. I keep second guessing myself about if this is just a rebound from Jay...or if this is real. But I can read their diary, and feel nothing. Oh, I feel twinges of disgust, but that's about it. I just smile to myself know that all of that is over, and that right now I have a wonderful person hovering around me, waiting for me to accept her offer of herself. The ball is in my court. *sigh* Fuck is April wonderful. The only word that I seem to use to describe her anymore is "amazing". She just can't be real. But, I talk to her best friend now, and he tells me that she truly is exactly what she appears to be. That blows my mind. And she is brutally honest, to the point that she renders me speechless. Just....amazing. IVY ~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017 |
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