I have come to the conclusion that I need a babysitter.

I've been just drooling over this J all fucking day.

As it begins......*sigh*

I'm gonna shower in a few here, then I'm gonna spark it up.

I find it amusing that sometimes I am getting tracks. Figure that out? I'll inject, and it gives me tracks. lol Mix that with my rekindled love of the green, and what do you get? A STEREOTYPE! lmao

Did that even make sense? Fucked if I know. All I know is I need to smoke this shit. I just know it will have me fucked later, and not wanting to go out, but I can always smoke another to get going again.

I quit smoking this shit in 2000 because Jay didn't like it. I was smoking it about 4-5 times a week sometimes, and she was all freaked that I was going OTT with it. Fuck whatever. I felt so fucking good last night, because I felt nothing except sore stomache muscles from laughing at Robbie. Fuck was he cooked. I get a mellow high. I sit quietly and watch the world go buy. This guy went all flamer, and was all tripped out by everything. It was nuts. I'd look at him, and he would trip me out, and I'd absolutely piss myself laughing.

Spoke to Z last night before I left. Filled her in on all this bullshit, and she made me realize something. And the more I think about it, the more sense it makes. I keep sayig Jays personality took a 180 on me, and completely changed. I think she has an older alter that is somewhat taking over. It makes alot of sense. I haven't been attacked like I was expecting to be. She has alot of shit she can attack me with, but I got threats and no action. I'm stumped. *shrugs* I will never know. It's just fucking with me because I can still feel her.

Speaking of Z, I told her about the whole pot mix they do, and she was as WTF?? as I was. European pot is like american beer. There is fuck all to it. Now they are taking that weak shit, and cutting it with tobacco? That shit wouldn't do fuck all to me. Z made a comment about maybe Jay is scared of B.C. bud. Makes me wonder. I offered alot, and she always said no. She was really prissy and uppity about it too. Would get pissed if I commented on wanting it.

Well, whatever. They are children who have no clue how to smoke the shit. That shit is so weak, mixing it with alcohol doesn't make you puke....but ours does. Too potent to mix. It works like milk and vinegar to the system....not good at all. Found that out the hard way when I was 18. But it was skunk, and Molson XXX. Fuck did I feel like crap. I'll never make that mistake again.

Well, there you go, another drug filled entry. I apologize for these...my mind is just wandering, and I would rather my entries be about drugs, then fucking offing myself.

But I still say I need a babysitter. Kal, if you would....if you see me going OTT, and I'm not seeing it. Give me shit for it. I'll listen to you....I think? Well...voice of reason, so yeah..probably. Sorry to ask, but I need a security net while my emotions are still raw. This shit goes down way too easy for me right now.

Well, better shower and stuff. Tonight is going to be an interesting night to say the least. I hope I don't get sexually assaulted.....who am I kidding? I hope I DO!

It's time to play with the big girls.

Mmmmmm yummy!

IVY

Quiet-Bitch!

~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017
~Relaxation~ - Tuesday, Sept. 01, 2015
~The hunt is on.~ - Tuesday, Aug. 04, 2015
~Sometimes~ - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014
~Fawk~ - Tuesday, Jan. 07, 2014