Okay.....sometimes I just "know" things.

I mean, I'll just know that something is going to happen or not, I'll know who is on the phone when it rings....without looking. I see things that come to pass. I worked to sharpen these gifts until they were less vague.

Now, with that said.....I feel calm. Almost excited. Sure I got that email....but something changed. The dark cloud lifted.

A realization hit while I was sitting here trying to figure out how to blackmail her. I realized I just did without meaning too. Her getting mad was proof that what I said was the truth. She just admitted guilt. She knows I know now. She knows I have seen proof. But there is a hitch....

Her bf doesn't know. He has no clue. He doesn't know he is with someone who raped her daughter. But I know. And she knows I know. She will be pissed at me, but is she gonna tell him why? Is she gonna tell Jay why? I got her. I seriously got her, and I didn't mean to.

An abuser doesn't like being told what to do. I did. An abuser doesn't like to be told that someone knows. I do. An abuser doesn't like being told that a person has seen proof of that abuse. I have.

Oddly enough I think that shit will be pushed back, and chances are I won't see Jay until Feb. But I just know she is coming. It's like all of this just made it definate.

Strange.

But oddly comforting. I do believe she is going to start having nightmares now. I can feel them coming. Her memories are unlocking. Oh yes, I have wicked empathy.....I can connect with someone, and feel what they do. I think old mumsy there won't be sleeping well for a few days.

In time she will start seeing Jay for who she is, and she won't be able to get away from it.

No. I've got her.

How long until she breaks?

So, I am listening to a band that was Jays fave when I first met her. It's taking me back to early 2000 again. It's oddly soothing.

No...shit changed. I can feel it. Like fire through my veins, I feel the excitement knowing she is gonna be coming back. Could be months away....but she is.

Then again, I could just be on a high from actually trapping her mom with words.

I'm not sure.

I am prepared for a severe crash soon though.

But no worries. I'll freak out, but won't be stupid. No more cutting...I can stab myself daily now. And no more suicidal tendencies....I'll just listen to the band.

I just wish I could get laid. *grumble*

But....on a lighter note......

Started my injections today. Tripped out the nurse because I was all psycho and playing with the needle and shit. She said training me was fun. She asked me if I was afraid of needles...then laughed when she realized that the piercings and tats were obviously a no.
I wasn't even paying much attention. She told me to "insert the needle" and I just stuck it in. She said "count to 10 while you push it down slowly" I did, and at about 5 I was like. HEY! I just stabbed myself WEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!

No, I'm not normal.

So now that I have a sick fascination....I'm all about wanting to stab myself again.

Yay for brutality!

damn....I gotta go rape something.

IVY

Quiet-Bitch!

~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017
~Relaxation~ - Tuesday, Sept. 01, 2015
~The hunt is on.~ - Tuesday, Aug. 04, 2015
~Sometimes~ - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014
~Fawk~ - Tuesday, Jan. 07, 2014