Ok, I'm on a big MPD kick.....just bare with me. Some people actually find this shit interesting....others find it a waste of time, or even doubt the authenticity of it all. All I can say is.....trust me honey, I'm living this shit.

I spoke of theories going out the window, well here is why.

Psychoanalitical assholes tell you that disassociation causes MPD. We'll I would have to agree with that. They speak alot about how the MPD reacts with their environment. But, on that...I disagree with most of what they said. They see their patients once a week, maybe twice. Thats an hour or two a week in which they see this person, and speak with this person, hardly enough time to begin to understand the hell they live in.

(NOTE: this takes place after the realization of the MPD. Before they can live almost normal lives)

Picture this.....you are locked to about 5-50 other people, no matter where you go, they are there. If you want to sleep, but they aren't tired, you are kept up by them chatting with eachother. When these people get mad, they attack you. They mess with your head, lie to you, insult you, They fuck you over by pretending to be you, they try to steal your spouse, they purposely try to get you beaten or raped. They are always there, they never leave. Once in awhile you lose the control you had, and a bad one can live as you, and you can't stop them at all.

Now think about it.....you are trapped with these people, never alone, and always being shit on. How would you feel?

What these doctors don't speak of is all of that. Try living with that....you don't want to, no one does. The doctors never speak of the suicidal idealations, or of even the attempts. I am sure that they write those off as a statistical figure. "ooops, lost another one.....well, we just won't say that next time"

Jay got so depressed one day, she took a hammer to her arm and broke it. Massive swelling and bruising, refused to go to a hospital, and lived in agony for a long time. This was in her teens, well before she met me. I can control these urges now. The point I am making is....an MPD can sometimes seem unhuman. If they can't handle something, an alter takes it. Simple as that. All these professionals won't speak of these types of things, only how sucessful they are with MPD's.

The discovery of the actual MPD was a very rare thing. It takes an amazing amount of trust for an alter to show themself. In this case Jay had been raped. No one cared but me. I tried to help her through it, an ended up impressing the alters by doing so. I asked J.C. one day, why I was chosen. (thats chosen to put her back together) She told me, that it was because Jay chose me. I am the only person who has ever shown her some form of care, and love. That in itself, is why I am in control of all of the alters.

Here's how it works.....The front man (jay) starts to develope trust, while the others sit back and watch. Once the trust is formed, and the Alters see you for who you really are, one of them will come out to say hi. Most of the time it will go unnoticed, be seen as a personality quirk. But if you are aware of certain signs, then you will spot it. The only rough part, is the "chosen one" ends up being a therapist to the front man, and a few dozen alters all at the same time. It gets hectic. They seem to all want to chat at the same time, and you never get a break. Everyone has problems, they all need advice, they all need to share. What do you do? Easy...the kids come first. Take the ages and break them down. Start at the youngest, and work your way up. Al of the elders are over protective of the kids, so they don't mind waiting while you chat with the little ones. It's a matter of setting rules, and keeping some sort of order.

I know this now, before I was lost, and all hell broke loose on several occasions. You are basically juggling your time with them. That was extremely hard though. While all that was going on, I was also trying to have a relationship with the front man. Not fun.

Never ever think that I have ever regretted being involved with her, I think the relationship works because of the fact I can't get bored. In some cases the MPD is why the relationship lasts. If I have a problem, and she won't listen, I speak with an alter, and they tell her. If she needs to say something to me, she sends me a message through an alter. I guess it's kinda like having a marriage counsellor around you 24/7.

Well, thats enough for now. My head is banging.

Laterz

IVY

Quiet-Bitch!

~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017
~Relaxation~ - Tuesday, Sept. 01, 2015
~The hunt is on.~ - Tuesday, Aug. 04, 2015
~Sometimes~ - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014
~Fawk~ - Tuesday, Jan. 07, 2014