I have informed everyone that I don't want to see anyone on my birthday. I don't want anything. I don't want to know.

I have informed everyone that I won't be involved in any xmas celebrating. I don't want anything. I don't want to know.

Anything I get will be nothing but money wasted that could have gone towards a flight.

Everything has lost it's lustre. The sun is out, and it looks so happy I want to slash my wrists. Food makes me gag.

I can't live without her. I can't even survive.

I told both of my parents that I see nothing to celebrate, and being around happy ppl will make me want to off myself. There is no light in my life anymore.

I called Air Canada about her flight last night. It was fully restricted. No changes, No upgrades, No refund. Her mom said that the only way Jay can come back is if she gets a job and pays for it herself. Jay has severe issues that prevent her from being able to work period.

I don't think Jay even realizes that she can't come at all.

She won't be here for my birthday, or xmas, or our 5 year anniversary.

My ex just called about taking Kristian out this weekend. I just asked him how much money he had. Dumb question. I broke down into tears talking to him. All he said was "Here's a bit of advice, don't start hawking things to get money". I told hm that would be pointless. Everything I have is worth nothing. I could clean out my apt, and still not have enough.

I crave curling up in a ball on the floor and waiting to die.

Why didn't she come? Why?

IVY

Quiet-Bitch!

~WTF?~ - Saturday, Mar. 25, 2017
~Relaxation~ - Tuesday, Sept. 01, 2015
~The hunt is on.~ - Tuesday, Aug. 04, 2015
~Sometimes~ - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014
~Fawk~ - Tuesday, Jan. 07, 2014